When it comes to amazing book titles, Keanu Reeves is Not in Love With You is right up there. This non-fiction book from Becky Holmes delves into the murky world of online romance fraud. So while the title works to put a smile on your face – and yes, it did draw me in and make me want to read it – the topic is a serious one. And one I’m so pleased I now know more about.
What is online relationship fraud?
In lockdown, Becky Holmes started a Twitter account @deathtospinach (because, yes, she just doesn’t like spinach) and was shocked at the amount of unsolicited messages she got from men trying to initiate romantic relationships – with the aim to get money out of her.
In Keanu Reeves is Not in Love With You, Becky shares transcripts of her messing with the online scammers in hilarious exchanges. She is approached by A LOT of Keanus – hence this book’s title. But she does this to highlight the serious issue. For every scammer she calls out – hopefully that’s one less to prey on another woman.
Eighty-two Keanus wanting a piece of me. Imagine that! I’d be knackered.
She notes that the amount of scams rocketed during lockdown as so many more people found themselves lonely, isolated and turning to social media to alleviate that. And the scammers knew that. You see, it’s not (always) one random man messaging a few women.
I was truly shocked to learn the huge level and scale of these scam operations. There are offices and scripts – based majoritively in Africa and Malaysia – that even tip into human trafficking territory.
The whole crime is currently so unregulated and unaccountable. Often women who report being scammed online, losing their life’s savings, see no action taken. What’s even more terrifying is how AI is only going to make it so much easier for scammers to fake whole people and back stories and ruin the lives of so many more.
The real impact
A key part of Keanu Reeves is Not in Love With You are the real accounts from women Becky interviews who have been victims of online relationship fraud. These true stories really hit home how lives are destroyed by this crime.
It’s scary how believable some of these scammers can be. Becky looks into the psychology of it all and points out that all the women she interviews are intelligent, articulate women who often consider themselves quite street-smart too. It’s other drivers that account for what happens.
Basically, if humans didn’t mostly trust each other, our species would have died out almost immediately.
Keanu Reeves is Not in Love With You reminds me a lot of the podcast I recently listened to Love Bombed – although that played out in real life rather than online – if you’re after further insight into the topic.
Overall, this is a great book that highlights the urgent changes needed to laws in order to keep women safe in this rapidly growing crime area.
- Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC;
- Get your copy of Keanu Reeves is Not in Love With You here;
- Published by Unbound January 2024;
- 288 pages;
- My rating:
Books on the 7:47 
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